We Love It!

I realise you must have been feeling neglected and cast aside over the past couple of weeks; it’s a while since I posted ‘Control’.  But I have an excuse in that I have been on holiday on America’s West Coast – I refuse to sit at a PC, when there’s a beach and the Pacific Ocean.

But I’ve been making notes in preparation for my return and reading them sat here in Barnsley Council offices; the occurrences, which I saw fit to report to you good people, seem like a million lifetimes away.

Three Fridays ago (13^th August); we (me, Gav, Gaz, Sam, Phil, James, Louise and Megan) jetted out of Heathrow towards LAX.  Despite being delayed for 2hrs and the flight almost being cancelled (according to the bloke checking my boarding card), the eventual journey was otherwise uneventful, which is always nice when hurtling along at 500mph and 38000ft in a giant cigar tube.  Phil’s seatback monitor worked and Gav managed to make it all the way without having OJ or tea spilled on him.  So we landed late in Los Angeles, negotiated the man with the torch and rubber glove and then caught a transfer bus to the Radisson.

We stayed there one night, before collecting the hire cars from Dollar, tramming down the 405 and eventually settling into the beach house at 114 35^th Street, Newport Beach.  We had been there 2hrs, when our old friend Tim “TJ The DJ” Johnson showed up… he took us to his friend’s house on 41^st to collect our bikes, which he had kindly stored for us.  They were in surprisingly good condition although if I had more than US$150 invested in mine, I might have gone to the bother of adjusting the headset and sorting out the rear derailleur indexing – but I was on holiday, didn’t have the tools and will probably never see the bike again!  Back to the beach house, quick change, few more beers on the balcony and then a cab to Sutra nightclub where we met a lad who was a cross between Michael J Fox and Justin Bieber.  He gave us his number and the assurance that he throws awesome parties where he “really fucks it up” and we were “very privileged” to have his contact details.  We never saw him again – through lack of trying!

Do not fear, I won’t write about every day individually; just pick out a few highlights from the fortnight!

The first highlight was the weather.  It was positively chilly on Saturday evening and on Sunday, we didn’t see much sun until about 2pm.  Residents told us this had been the case all summer so we feared the worst.  Fortunately, we seem to have dropped on the West Coast’s beach town’s best period of weather as we were treated to clear blue skies until the day before we headed home.

We were urged to visit the OC Fair before it finished and so we did.  I always enjoyed visiting the annual fair with my parents at Friarwood HGV park in Pontefract so this brought back some good memories!  The only mistake we made was eating before we got there…  the food selection was greater than the ride selection – I so wish I had room in my stomach for giant turkey legs and deep-fried butter.  Despite my fear of heights which follows no set rules and varies between cliff-tops, ladders, roller coasters, garage roofs etc I revelled in the Ferris (Bueller?  Bueller?  Bueller?) wheel and the sky ride from one end of the park to the other.  Looking back, the sky ride wasn’t particularly safe and Sam’s subsequent white knuckles and pale complexion were very much testament to this!

We went out for a drink just about every night; nothing heavy, but on a few occasions I ended up pretty wasted.  Me, Gaz, Phil, Louise, Megan and Tim headed to ‘Landmark’, in Laguna, to meet our friend Alexis and her friend Tina.  We had a really good night and it was great to catch up with an old friend and make a new one.  By the way, I recommend you have a read of Alexis’ blog which is all about delicious food!  I blame my state of intoxication on the free sample shots and proper European lager…

The following Saturday, we headed up the 405 freeway to downtown LA and Sunset Boulevard to be more precise.  We started in a pretty lame bar called ‘The Red Rock’ for a few warm-up drinks and then proceeded to the Viper Room and Whiskey a Go Go.  As usual (speaking as though I go every week) there was live music at both venues: we caught the whole set from ‘Phil Baranchik's Eyelash Factory’ at Viper Room and the tail end of the set at Whiskey a Go Go.  Once the band had finished, we finished off the night by laying down some moves on the dance floor and then heading to Mel’s Drive-In for a bite to eat… well most of us did; one or two chose to sit in the car park…

A day to recover before heading Las Vegas.  We stayed at The Mirage – two adjoining quad rooms for US$27 each which was spot on really.  No point spending anything more when only being in them for a few hours.  During the day, I was accosted by a girl working at one of those mobile stores in the ‘Fashion Show’ mall.  She was selling skin treatment products.  I had half hour to spare so I thought I’d be polite and let her do her thing.  After having a good few $ worth of product massaged into my face (which I’ll be honest, I was impressed with), I told her the majority of my cash was back at the hotel so she basically told me to fuck off.  There’s a moral to this story, but I’ll let you make your own interpretations.

Come 8pm, we got suited and booted (not ideal in Vegas temperatures) and headed off for some Roulette action.  Gav came away even, but then tipped the croupier $5 and was hence ‘down’ for the evening.  I don’t gamble (used to), but put $1 in a bandit while waiting for a drink - $26 return, thank you very much Mr Caesar!  On to ‘Jet’ nightclub in our hotel – we were told it was a good place to go and we also had complementary tickets.  I thought it was okay and me and Gav stayed there til the early hours once again trying to impress on the dance floor.  We went for a wander and on a search for food… I headed back about half hour before Gav and in that time he bumped into Ron Jeremy who apparently acquiesced in a delightful manner when asked to have his photo taken.  Don’t pretend you don’t know who Ron Jeremy is!

The remainder of our stay in Newport was taken at a leisurely pace: beach, bar, beach, bar, bed, beach, bar… you get the idea.  We did go to the baseball (Angles; not Dodgers) for Big Bang Friday and although the game itself was boring, the firework display, beer and food was pretty good.  We finished our last night in Newport Beach in the only way imaginable; getting tanked in District bar.

Good times.

I’m already planning my next trip, so if have any recommendations or can even offer me accommodation then let me know!

Thanks for reading.

PS. items that didn’t make it into this post:

1. Phil playing golf with the plunger in the bathroom;
2. Gav being man-handled by a girl with unfeasibly large hands;
3. James attempting to use the till/computer in BJ’s to make his own dessert order;
4. Tim’s 36hr bender;
5. and Sam losing his money then realising it was in his wallet.